Dear Dr. Irene,
I come back to your site every week, to read the updates and new stuff. I
am amazed at how much love and effort this site took, and what a
significant difference this site makes to so many people whose lives have
been touched by abuse. Thank you so much for taking the time and emotional
energy it must take to keep this site going ! You are making a difference
in many, many lives.
Thank you, thank you, and again - thank you, Roberta
Thank you for the kind feedback. I'm going thru the site now making
revisions. Your letter prompted me to go back to your page where I made some minor
changes. Check it out.
Best wishes for a wonderful 2000. Dr. Irene
Ps: are you beginning to recognize that you do have (appropriate) anger?
can you see the difference between anger & rage - we don't want you
Sent: Monday, January 03, 2000 9:17
Subject: Thank you
Dear Dr. Irene,
I just got back from vacation, and found your e-mail. Thanks !!
As to the matter of anger - I'm still not very able at feeling,
recognizing, and showing anger - appropriate or otherwise - but I am
literally working on it. I've started therapy again. GOOD!
It has become clear to me that I am unable to set boundaries - for myself
and others. I think this has a lot to do with the anger issue. You bet!!! ("Trample on my space if you really need
to. I care about you enough that I will deal with it. After all, its only
I deny my anger or feel very guilty about it, instead of realizing that my
anger is a healthy sign that tells me "Stop! your boundaries are
being infringed upon". But I do so hate to feel anger. It's like
someone is pouring acid down my stomach! Somebody
taught you anger was an awful thing to be avoided at all costs. This is
where reeducating yourself in therapy is essential.
I also have a very (VERY) hard time in trusting my emotions and
"gut-instincts". I usually assume that my feelings are wrong,
and that there is a very logical explanation to why I am feeling these
("wrong") gut feelings. Good! It is essential to know
these things about yourself.
I am just now starting to learn ,
first, to acknowledge my gut instincts Right or wrong, they
deserve recognition. If I ignore them, I get terrible binge eating
episodes, so I really have no choice anymore (LOL!) - but, if
appropriate - to act upon them. Wow!
The good new is, I am working very hard at it in therapy, this time with a
I have left my abusive SO, and have flatly (but politely) refused to take
him back. It was actually
amazing to see this proud , vain man ask for a second chance. To think I
so desperately needed his approval, in the past!
I hope I have learned my lesson, and that I will never, never allow
anyone to abuse me again. I
Hope I will be able to let you know some really good news in the months to
And again - thank you so much for helping me realize I have a problem, and
what the solution to this problem is. It really was so much help, at a
time I really needed it most.
Warmest regards, Roberta
Warmest regards to
you Roberta. Thanks for your update. You give hope and inspiration to
people who haven't yet made their moves. Dr. Irene
See Roberta's June 2000 update here.