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4/14 Interactive Board: Codependent Partners

3/23 Interactive Board: He's Changing... I'm Not...

3/1 Interactive Board: D/s Lifestyle

1/14 Interactive Board: My Purrrfect Husband

12/12 Interactive Board: What if He Could Have Changed?

10/23 Interactive Board: Quandary Revisited

8/24 Interactive Board: Quandary! What's Going On?

7/20: Dr. Irene on cognitive behavior therapy and mindfulness

6/12 Interactive Board: Unintentional Abuse

11/7 Interactive Board: Is This Abusive?

12/29 Interactive Board: There Goes the Wife...

11/4 Interactive Board: A New Me!

10/8 Interactive Board: Seeming Impossibility

9/8 Interactive Board: My Ex MisTreats Our Son

5/1 Interactive Board: I feel Dead - Towards Him

4/26 Interactive Board: Why is This So Hard?

4/19 Interactive Board: I Lost My Love...

4/7 Interactive Board: Too Guilty!

Doc@DrIrene.com

Support For The Abuser

Support For The Abuser


Sent: Thursday, October 07, 1999 11:37 AM
Subject: Abuse Website


Dr Irene,

     As ironic as it may seem, I'm reading your site sitting with my ex-wife. While we were married, I abused booze as well as my ex; hence the term "ex." Seems it took a divorce, and me getting help, for us to become friends again.

     While I can identify with 99% of what I've read on your website, I haven't found anything that refers to the fact that with CONSTANT AWARENESS, open communications, and counseling, an abusive partner can adjust their actions prior to falling back into "old habits."  The impression that all is hopeless with an abuser is not accurate.

     Keep up the outstanding work.  I can't think of a better medium for women to gain access to the information you provide.  Unfortunately, most of them can do it in private and think they are solving the problem without actually talking about it to someone.  But, every little bit that helps prevent this problem is worth it!!!

     Again, thank you.

Hi,

All I can say is "huh"? If you look at the articles on the abuser pages, I constantly refer to self-awareness and self-control - the exact ingredients for the difficult changes that need to be made - and CAN BE made! In case you haven't noticed, this site is very big on helping & supporting the abuser! About half of my practice is about treating abuser guys - and gals! So get off the victim pages & find the abuser stuff! 

I am here for YOU too! (Even got an abuser support email list, Grrrr!)

By the way, I'm glad you and your ex are friends. Keep up the good work! 

Best wishes,

Dr. Irene