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4/14 Interactive Board: Codependent Partners

3/23 Interactive Board: He's Changing... I'm Not...

3/1 Interactive Board: D/s Lifestyle

1/14 Interactive Board: My Purrrfect Husband

12/12 Interactive Board: What if He Could Have Changed?

10/23 Interactive Board: Quandary Revisited

8/24 Interactive Board: Quandary! What's Going On?

7/20: Dr. Irene on cognitive behavior therapy and mindfulness

6/12 Interactive Board: Unintentional Abuse

11/7 Interactive Board: Is This Abusive?

12/29 Interactive Board: There Goes the Wife...

11/4 Interactive Board: A New Me!

10/8 Interactive Board: Seeming Impossibility

9/8 Interactive Board: My Ex MisTreats Our Son

5/1 Interactive Board: I feel Dead - Towards Him

4/26 Interactive Board: Why is This So Hard?

4/19 Interactive Board: I Lost My Love...

4/7 Interactive Board: Too Guilty!

Doc@DrIrene.com

Hurting Myself

Hurting Only Myself

What it Took For One Woman to Find Her Power

Sent: Monday, April 26, 1999 8:00 PM

Tomorrow I go for surgery.  On my arm.   Nerve damage from a cut.  It took 50 stitches to close it.  And you know what?  All because I choose to stay in a relationship that I should have left long ago.  In fact,  I did leave, only to come back.  Twice.  ???   Just dumb I guess!  Wan to know the really sad part?  I did it.  I put my arm through the glass.  I was panicked. Frightened.  Confused.  I just wanted the screaming, the name calling, the shoving to stop.  He took the keys 30 minutes before I was to be at work. Told me to call someone, find another way there.   That is how the whole thing started.  Funny thing is this - It is all my fault.  I did this. I didn't have to over-react.  I am the DUMB one, he would never stick his hand through a window.  At least that is what he wants me to believe.   But, I am going to make a change in my life.  I'm tired.  Just plain tired.  And, I don't want to be anymore.  I can do this - I will do this - 6 years of my life has been 6 years too many.  I've aged 10.  I want those 4 back. So, I just ask for some words of encouragement as I seek out a place of my own in this world......
"No weapon formed against me shall prosper"

Dear Kara,

The best part of owning your stuff is that you are free to dis-own (ie., stop) it.

If it helps, know that while you put your arm through glass, you had a cheering squad: you fell victim to provocation by an expert.  OK, so you went back twice. Let's shoot you for caring and having a big, forgiving heart.

Dear Lady, none of us are perfect. We do our best. Until we learn to do better. And better. And better. All this is part of life. Try to keep in mind that no experience is lost. In this, you have discovered a piece of your power.

Thank you for sharing your tale. My best, best wishes for your speedy physical and emotional recovery,

Dr. Irene