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4/14 Interactive Board: Codependent Partners

3/23 Interactive Board: He's Changing... I'm Not...

3/1 Interactive Board: D/s Lifestyle

1/14 Interactive Board: My Purrrfect Husband

12/12 Interactive Board: What if He Could Have Changed?

10/23 Interactive Board: Quandary Revisited

8/24 Interactive Board: Quandary! What's Going On?

7/20: Dr. Irene on cognitive behavior therapy and mindfulness

6/12 Interactive Board: Unintentional Abuse

11/7 Interactive Board: Is This Abusive?

12/29 Interactive Board: There Goes the Wife...

11/4 Interactive Board: A New Me!

10/8 Interactive Board: Seeming Impossibility

9/8 Interactive Board: My Ex MisTreats Our Son

5/1 Interactive Board: I feel Dead - Towards Him

4/26 Interactive Board: Why is This So Hard?

4/19 Interactive Board: I Lost My Love...

4/7 Interactive Board: Too Guilty!

Doc@DrIrene.com

Comments for Good Mess

Comments for Good Mess

Material posted here is intended for educational purposes only, and must not be considered a substitute for informed advice from your own health care provider.

Courtesy of Dr. Irene Matiatos   Copyrightę 1998-2001. The material on this website may be distributed freely for non-commercial or educational purposes provided that author credit is given. For commercial distribution, please contact the author at Doc@drirene.com

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Sunday October 14, 2001
08:07 PM

test

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Monday October 15, 2001
09:58 AM

I'm glad you've learned a lot of good things about yourself in this relationship and have become a better person because of it. Be thankful that you never were actually with this person; it most likely would have been a LOT worse. Since it was an exclusively online relationship, I would suggest that it was based more on fantasy than reality. I have observed that many people (especially people with Borderline Personality Disorder, or people who are bottomless pits of need) use the internet as an attention-giving machine. You can get lots of attention from e-mail, but since there is no physical interaction, you don't have to give back, reciprocate, etc.; it's a way of being intimate and keeping your distance at the same time. I think that's what you happened upon without realizing it. Good luck to you. At least you know that no one will do this to you again. XX.

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Friday October 19, 2001
11:34 AM

The pain does end before death. I am 1 1/2 years out of an abusive relationship. I chose to work very hard on my own issues and anger so I would stop making the same mistakes and having so much pain in my life. For the first time in my life, I love myself, have peace and feel happy and grateful every day. I am still in a court battle with the abuser, trying to get $$ he owes me, but now when I see him I feel nothing. Not even anger and hatred. I know I wouldn't be at this point if I had not stopped focusing on how bad he was and started becoming the person I wanted to be. I wish you the best in your journey! S.

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Wednesday October 24, 2001
10:53 AM

I have the impression you put all your eggs into one basket with this internet-relationship. Surely such a relationship has limits to how far it can grow, like a tree in a small pot, and when those limits are reached you are left with nothing... Z.

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Thursday November 08, 2001
09:53 PM

I am out of a bad relationship. I am reading this to remind me of the crap I am not missing. Thank You. I am though wondering if there is such a thing as a healthy relationship?????? I have yet to see one... okay two......Dianna

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