Narcs car is finally gone- I don't know if that means he is - but I think so
Posted 31 July 2012 - 10:50 AM
Just putting it out there.
I feel shakey but good.
I feel shakey because I don;t know for sure.
Posted 31 July 2012 - 11:05 AM
So he pulled a 'geographical'. But no matter where he sleeps he will still wake up with himself.
Posted 31 July 2012 - 12:46 PM
yeah he did.
He is a "runner".
He is from the mid west.
he went to CA to work for like maybe a year - where he was arrested for DUI 1
then he went to NYC to make his first billion as an investment banker. That didn;t pan out so he went a little outside the city to work for a smaller form. That lasted a year or two.
Then he went to an adjoining state for 6 years and got a job at a firm. That lasted maybe a year. Dui #2
when I met him a year and a half ago he was busting at the seams to leave- "I am dating a girl in PA, maybe I will move there with her", maybe out west, I don't know.
then when we got together, it was a house here, several other states, he needed to have a house in his home town- a big one with a big kitchen for parties!
and all I heard all spring when he would call me to hang out and then tell me to "move on" was "I JUST WANT TO MOVE!!!....ON with my trial"
he has a thing about punishing by with holding so he didn't want me to know he was planning on moving at the time -
A guy from my bible study said the same thing you did- "he's one of those people who moves from place to place, praying on others and making a mess, then picks up and moves somewhere else and does the same thing all over again"
I still don;t know how I feel. But I can tell you, for the first time in a year, I have been able to get up and do my work and concentrate on it and feel hopeful.
I feel like a demonic opression has been lifted from me. It's really weird. All of a sudden, I am clear headed and driven. Although shakey - a bit -
LH- I have no idea who is crazier- him or me-
but I do know that somehow I feel like ... free...and I am grateful to God for giving me a week to get used to the idea of his going. It gave me a chance to e mail or leave a note on his windshield if that's what I thought was best. I did not think that was best. so what it did was give me a chance to "say goodbye" in my mind, and make the decision for myself that there is nothing to say and I just wanted him to go. It gave me a chance to get over the feeling that he "just left without saying anything" by allowing me an opportunity to get in touch with him to express any anger that I may have needed to, with a week to decide if I needed to, and I didn't. It gave me some input and some control over what I needed to do, rather than HIM deciding everything once again.
I didn't want to see him. And I didn't have to. But at least I got to choose.
Posted 31 July 2012 - 02:06 PM
he went to pick up a trailor to move.
it's being loaded right now-
Posted 31 July 2012 - 10:34 PM
Posted 01 August 2012 - 10:29 AM
I saw the new tenant come here in the later afternoon- he's moving in today.
It's over. he's gone.
I am in a really weird space.
Free and happy.
Shocked that this is the reality.
"will you marry me?" man moved clear accross country without a word to me. Not an apology, nothing.
I wasn't expecting one, but somewhere in the back of my head, I still have trouble accepting that a person can be that way.
I am a little weirded out which I suspect will last for a few days until I get used to it.
But yeah- the dark cloud is gone....
Posted 01 August 2012 - 10:52 AM
Now you can get on with your life!!!! YAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!
Posted 01 August 2012 - 02:35 PM
When things really started to slide downhill in my marriage, I started getting back pain again. So bad thatI would wake up in the middle of the night unable to breathe. The only thing that helped was sleeping in a different bed away from my abuser.
I am not discounting your pain or your physical problems, but you are a very smart lady and I wouldn't be surprised if some of your physical pain is a result of the emotional turmoil you experienced living next door to your abuser.
Posted 01 August 2012 - 03:32 PM
...not so sure abut smart though...I mean, I picked THAT guy and saw flags and ran into the fire anyway...but madness is just one step away from genious ROFLMAO
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